My Annual #MLB Predictions for the 2013 Season (humor intended)
For the last several years, I have (with stellar excellence and not a small dose of sarcasm) made my annual predictions for the upcoming MLB season. This year is no different. I shall, once again, indeed, bestow upon the waiting, excited and breathless world, my dead pan locks on who will do what in the baseball world this year.
So without further ado, here ya go… enjoy.
The National League:
Let me start by saying, if the NL wasn’t playing mediocre, lesser baseball already, now that interleague play will be an everyday occurrence thanks to the move of the Houston Astros to the AL, it is going to be further exposed on a daily basis this year. Each and every day of the regular season, America will get to decide for themselves just how inferior the NL truly is. I wish them well, and I tip my cap to the ole’ Chicago Cubbys again this year. But alas, the AL will once again, in daily form now, prove their superiority in every way.
My only hope is that the NL will somehow, someway figure out a way to deal with the lack of DH situation for their hitting pitchrs. After all, as I said a year ago, its like watching 13% lesser baseball.
Now for my NL musings;
NL East: Winner: Washington Nationals
I believe that the Nationals will once again bring their awesomeness to the NL East. They have done right by baseball in building that organization from the minors all the way up to the big league level. They’ve got pitching galore, and their young phenoms Bryce Harper and their veteran Ryan Zimmerman will prove just how ridiculously good they are. For the rest of the NL East, its kind of a like showing up for a blind date and then realizing that when your friend said the girl he wanted you to meet had a “big smile” what he actually meant was “she has buck teeth.” That’s the NL East! Buck Teeth!!!! You can call it a smile if you want, but I don’t see it. Come on, the Marlins backed up the truck and deceived the fine residents of south Florida, the Mets have partnered with Amway, the Phillies, ugh, I can’t even bare the thought. The Braves will be the only ones who could possibly give the Nationals a run for their money. But it will all hinge upon the Upton brothers, one of which I have personal knowledge, as a Rays fan, can be a little flighty and unfocused.
NL Central: Winner: St. Louis Cardinals
As for the NL Central, it is once again an ugly pick for me. The Cardinals will be just a notch or two better than the Reds, not in talent, but in hustle, and the rest of the division is a couple of notches above Beer League Softball. which makes my heart sad. I wish the Chubs were going to be better and Theo is certainly working on it, but its still a long ways off. The Pirates, with all of their bright yellow Oregon Ducks wanna be uniforms are just not going to live up to greatness their ballpark deserves (have you seen that place at sunset?). And the Brewers, um, well, I’m glad they’re a beer and cheese town, b/c they’re going to need something to wash their blues away and go with their collective whine. So it’s the Cardinals again this year, I guess. Oh well.
NL West: Winner: San Francisco Giants
Okay, here’s the deal, when the Dodgers finally realize what the Red Sox learned the hard way last year, that you can’t just buy expensive talent and expect them to be world class without good leadership, they will actually have something to compete about. Until then, the West is going to be a picnic basket full of spoiled deviled eggs and a leaky gatorade. There will be the typical Padres nothingness mixed with Arizona’s not-quite-there-again ness, and Colorado’s “What? You mean all this is for real? We thought people just came because we have pine trees in center field?” Although Gonzalez is something to behold. My only regret is that Troy Tulowitzki isn’t on a better team. So much talent, so little time. The Giants pitching is sick. Lincecum will finally be able to see all the way around the field because of his new 8 year old boy hair cut and what can you say about Buster Posey. That duffer is sick in a good way. Like “Mom, I’m feeling sick, so I better stay home from school so I can watch all the games on Opening day,” Good kinda of sick.
NL Wild Cards: Cincinnati Reds & Atlanta Braves
Votto is a beast. And the Upton brothers will get the help they need from those two bullpen guys who are amazing in ATL.
NL Pennant: Washington Nationals
I think they can do it. I think the true test will be around how good of a leader Davey Johnson is. Can he adapt his leadership style enough from old school to empower those young guys to play up to their full potential. Only 162 games will tell.
All in all, I like the Nats this year. Take it to the bank.
And now, to the superior league, The American League.
What’s not to love about them? (Well, other than the obvious, NY Yankees) but for real, the AL is just stacked again. And for anyone who disagrees with you, just remember, telling someone “We don’t have the Pirates.” is the equivalent to saying, “Your mom,” to someone at anytime during an argument. It’s like an automatic win!
AL East: Winner: Tampa Bay Rays
I know, I can hear all of you Red Sox fans screaming in your Boston accents right now. But its true and I’m gonna prove it to you right now. (I know I’m a little biased, but not really. Here goes.)
The Yankees are fielding a geriatric team this year. I’m just not sure Jeter can get his cane and wheelchair around fast enough to cover the infield like he used to. (He’s my age by the way, ouch.) And ARod, oh wait, is he even? I mean isn’t he? Didn’t he have surgery? When will he be back? Oh, I don’t know, right about the time the next Yankee in line gets hurt. And, yes, the Yankees will be paying him $29,000,000 to not play at least half the year! It’s gonna be ugly this year NY, but I will admit, your ballpark is amazing. Well done. That’s the best $1.3 Billion I could think of spending in a city like yours.
Boston, come on, name 3 of your starting pitchers. with certainty. Can’t do it can you? Neither can your manager. Which is whom? Oh yeah, don’t really know much about him either huh. This is gonna be a long ride in the 4 or 5 spot of hte AL East this year, Boston. Get ready for it now.
Baltimore will under perform because they overperformed last year. 2012 was your chance, O’s and because you didn’t do anything to get better in the off season except lose Thome it’s gonna be an uphill fight all year.
Toronto on the other hand, did do everything short of buying beachfront propety in Miami to get better. But there’s a jury and its still out like it was in the OJ Simpson trial when I was in college. Does talent buy a championship? Not if you believe in leadership at all. I don’t think they can keep the clubhouse in order up there. RA Dickey is a beast and all of the former Marlins have bad work habits from their time under Ozzie. Good luck with that.
Which leaves the Rays! The Rays beefed up their offense and their defense big time, and still have the best overall organizational development system in all of baseball. Not to mention, Joe Maddon, who is hands down the best leader in all of the game today! When you regularly hear reports about players who will gladly turn down more money to get a chance to play in Tampa Bay, not because of our beautiful stadium (sarcasm intended) but because of the way we play, you know you’re on to something!
I pick Tampa, and not just because I’m a fan, but because they are the best built team in the AL East. Period.
AL Central: Detroit Tigers
At the very thought of the AL Central, I get a little nausious. I mean, the White Sox were the southside arch enemy of my childhood team, the Cubs, and the Tigers, I don’t know why I don’t like them, I just don’t. They just strike me as dirty. Not like, play the game wrong, dirty, but like, “Have those guys showered lately?” dirty. I don’t know.
I love the Royals and the way they’ve built that system, much like the Rays, but unfortunately, I’m not sure they have the fire power to overcome the dirty Tigers for 162 games.
The Twins (twinkies) are horrible, trust me, I saw them all spring, and the Indians, even with Terry Francona, aren’t gonna compete.
Tigers again. Whatever.
AL West: Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim
One word: Wow! Where’s the holes in that line up? No seriously, From 1 to 9, they could field an all-star team every single stinkin’ night! Trumbo, Pujols, Trout, Hamilton, just to name a few. If they can stay healthy, there’s no stopping them now.
The Rangers got gutted in the off-season, but hey, if you get to the World Series as many times as they have in the last few years, and you don’t bring home the trophy, you deserve to be gutted.
Oakland, they’re gonna compete but not like last year. They’ll underwhelm because of that, and oh, yeah, their horrible ballpark. Move them to San Jose, its gotta be better than where they are!
Seattle, ah the wonderful land of coffee and losing baseball. What a shame. They’re trying. King Felix should have got out when he had the chance.
And then there’s the newly added Houston Astros. Total Payroll this year: $18.7 Million. That’s 2/3 of Alex Rodriguez’s personal salary. But here’s what I’ll say, I like it! I like that they’re building the thing from the ground up. They’re young, scrappy, and their manager is only 40 years old! If they can truly commit to building a next generation franchise, they’ll be something to watch in 4 or 5 years. Don’t say I didn’t tell you so, Astros in 2018 baby!!!
AL Wild Cards:
New York Yankees
Toronto Blue Jays
The Yankees always seem to find a way to pay people way to much to get to 90+ wins. And Toronto just wants it alot as well.
Which takes us to the Playoffs:
NL Recap:
East: Nationals
Central: Cardinals
West: Giants
Wild Card: Braves
Wild Card: Reds
NL Pennant: Washington Nationals
AL Recap:
East: Rays
Central:Tigers
West: Angels
Wild Card:Yankees
Wild Card: Blue Jays
AL Pennant: Tampa Bay Rays
World Series:
vs.
Winner: Tampa Bay in 6 Games!!!
There you go people, take it to the bank again this year, because I’m confident that is exactly how the season is going to go down.
You’re welcome!
Enjoy the season,
Matt Keller